Category Archives: Personal Development

Every day habits

Play that old game with me where you take a phrase and change the emphasis on the key word to explore how that changes the meaning. Let’s start with every day HABITS. >

Without interruption

It occurs to me that one of the reasons I write a weekly blog, is that I get to tell a whole story without being interrupted. There is something satisfying about completing my entire thought without being diverted into someone else’s response/ thoughts before I finished. As someone who listens for a living, it made me curious if others feel that way, too. >

Be a little wild

So much of our time is spent in controlled environments, we begin to believe we are in control of our world. Just around sunset, we had a visitor at our condo in Mammoth. This little bear was not particularly dangerous as it wandered through town looking for a trash can it could eat from. But, it was wild. Our dog was curious but kept his distance, then some other dog appeared and charged the bear and backed off when the bear turned on him.

Is there somewhere in your world that you need to be a little wild? >

Learn new stuff

If you are feeling bored, frustrated, old, tired, stuck – any or all of the above, may I suggest you set a plan to learn some new stuff. Learning new stuff forces new neural pathways through your brain which keeps you younger and healthier. And, yes. you still need to drink lots of water and wear sunscreen if you want to look young and feel healthy. >

What is your legacy?

We spent a lovely sunset cruising the Newport Harbor celebrating the 80th birthday of our dear friend and fellow Vistage Chair – Rick Leckey. I was shocked to learn that Rick was 80 and when he joked he was really turning 60, I had to agree he looked that youthful. Going strong with no plans to retire. Vistage Chairs are like that. Purpose shines an internal light and keeps the outer shell (the body) a little healthier.

Many guests spoke with thanks about who Rick is as a friend, a mentor and a wise Chair. Several thanked him for guiding them along a wiser path than they were choosing for themselves.It was lovely.

On the drive home, a familiar song came on from The Temptations. Perhaps you recognize the lyrics

Papa was a rolling stoneWherever he laid his hat was his homeAnd when he died, all he left us was alone

Which legacy would you choose? If you don’t think you can change your legacy from today forward, permit me to share what my brother Joe said at our mother, Marilyn Paller’s, funeral. As background, Mom died at 87 after many years of struggling with diabetes and then kidney failure. My brother had a strained relationship with her for most of his life and I was surprised to hear him say how much he admired Mom in his eulogy. He said that most people get meaner as they age when struggling with health issues, limitations and the end of life. Marilyn became a nicer person, less judgmental, who did not complain about her life. Instead she made you welcome and wanted to hear about your life. He hoped to be more like that as he continued to age.

Who do you want to leave with good memories? What is one thing you could do this week to make your legacy an even better one?

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Photo of Rick Leckey and Beth Adkisson, Newport Beach, CA.

Notice your habits

As you return from a lovely long weekend (hopefully all true), notice your good and bad habits perhaps exaggerated by the gift of more free time. The Black Friday sales blew up my inbox and I realized I was scrolling for a very long time each day this weekend. I must admit I bought a new humidifier and a couple of stocking stuffer gifts. Note to self: delete, don’t open. >

Take 5 minutes

Watching a beautiful sunrise this week, I stood in awe at the window and just breathed deeply. Totally in the moment, I did not plan my day, I did not think, I just took deep breaths and looked at the sunrise. SO simple, right? Take 5 minutes and just be in the moment. >

Duty

Duty is not a concept we discuss much these days. With the passing of Queen Elizabeth II of England this week, her example of duty to god and country has been widely honored, and seen as the passing of an era. Did the concept of duty pass with her?

Duty was what got her generation through a great depression and World War II. They committed to the common good against outside forces intent on destroying civilization as they knew it. When she became queen she took on the duty to lead the empire and the church of England.

We grew up with duty through The Pledge of Allegiance, When you become a lawyer or take a political office you pledge allegiance to the US Constitution. As children we learned the boy and girl scout pledges. When you marry, you pledge to be faithful and responsible to your spouse.

Today, we use phrases like take responsibility, keep commitments, be accountable. That generation would have said do your duty. Is it the same thing? I’m not so sure. Duty came from societal norms. We all agreed to follow “the rules”. And by doing so, we would be rewarded for being a good person, and society would be better for it.  There was not much tolerance for doing things outside the rules which were dictated to you by tradition, religion and society.

We have come well past the rigidity demanded in those times which is good. We have also accepted a lot of bad behavior in the spirit of doing ones own thing. Putin’s invasion of Ukraine reminds us that we cannot assume the world order will just keep humming along.  As much as we don’t like the idea, duty to our fellows and saving the planet will require sacrifice. Elizabeth understood this and leaned into the challenge. It was a life well lived.

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image courtesy of usmagazine.com

Reunited, and it feels so good!

This weekend, about 85 Vistage Chairs with over 10 years of mastery got together in Boulder or on zoom to nourish our souls and fan the flame of the work we do at Keepers of the Flame. Wow! >

Life expectancy – yours

If you look up a life expectancy calculator like this one, and you put in your birthdate it will tell you on average how may more years you should live. Despite our arrogant human hubris that we will live forever, there will be an end one day. I know, not for you. >